April 03, 2017

Our Father is Gone...

Sorry for the sudden hiatus. If you read the post title you'll know why. So here's a bit of the story. I'm tearing up as I write this post.

Our father, we call him Papa, sometimes "Paps" or "Pops", passed away on March 22, 2017. He suddenly had a hard time breathing so my mother rushed him to the hospital. There we found out that his lungs are congested (water retention) and he had a very high creatinine level, The doctors are about to prep him for emergency dialysis but he flatlined before surgery... cardiac arrest. His official cause of death is Acute Myocardial Infraction (heart attack), his old sickness 36 years ago but triggered by many complications on the day he died.

It happened so fast that even we were shocked. Because he still want to recover and his vitals are normal before sending him to the O.R. but his body suddenly gave up. My mother was shocked and petrified (no pun intended) but she still managed to deliver the grim news to us in my father's room in the hospital. I hugged my mother and then she starts crying. As I hug my mother, I remember all the good memories we all spent together with our Paps because we are all so close together that's when I started crying. The doctors are trying to revive him within 30 minutes or else, my Pops is gone.

The doctor briefed my mother and me. They said my father still doesn't have a heartbeat for 45 minutes and asked us if we still want to revive him, but there's a chance that he will be in a vegetative state. We looked at each other and came with a quick and painful decision... We decided to let Paps go... It's better that way than to see him alive but in a coma and suffering even more.

In his death bed, We looked at him, he looks like he's just sleeping peacefully. As a bit of a joker as I am and trying to lighten up the mood a bit, I said to my father that he's still a handsome guy even in death. Then we hugged and kissed him for the last time and I shook his hand because I respect him and I want to congratulate him for beating death by not suffering too much.

Today (April 3) is his birthday, my Paps is supposed to turn 62 today. We went to the cemetery to visit him, we offered one of his favorite foods and a soda. We are all sad but we still celebrated and sang a happy birthday song for him at his grave.

Paps is the kind of guy that doesn't want to make us worry. On the outside he was a rock, but inside he's a fluffy bread. Our Paps doesn't forcefully shove his intentions to us, like he wants us to take the course or do the things he liked. He wanted us, his children, to decide for ourselves, take our own path and gain experience from it. And he sometimes spoil us but he did raise us to be good, loving and God-fearing people. He really did a good job as a father, sure there may be ups and downs but I can't complain about it.

So here's to you Paps I wish you Godspeed on your journey to Heaven. We will miss the time we watch T.V. together, joke at each other, have road trips and eat together. It's sad that you won't hold and play with your first grandchild like you did since the day he was born. It's also sad that you won't hold and play with my future kids, but I hope you'll watch over us, especially our Mams.

Cheers to you my father, thank you and we love you.

I will now dedicate all my work for you, just forgive the sudden slacking. After all, you're a slacker sometimes too, LOL.

R.I.P. 1955-2017

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